Take the first step…

One more step… keep looking up… one more step… don’t think about how high up you are… Oh, God, why did I agree to this… almost there… almost there… I could hear my Dan coming behind me, speaking words of encouragement…. one more step…. you’re doing it…

Ahhhh…. there I was… at the top of our tallest silo, 84 feet up. I made it. Deep breaths… Oh, the feeling of wind on my face… I could see Toronto across Lake Ontario, just like I’d been promised. Feelings of exhilaration filled me as I soaked in the view.

Then it was time to descend.

I started backing down the steps. No problem. Just go back down. Just do all this in reverse, and you’ll be back on wonderful, solid earth. Wondering how far I had to go, I looked down.

Yes, that’s right. I looked down. What a mistake. The farm buildings and equipment looked like miniature toys. That is when I realized how high up I was. My legs started to shake uncontrollably, and I held on with a white-knuckled death grip. I was envisioning falling, landing on my poor husband, who then would need twice the strength to get us back to safety. Thinking back, I’m sure that my fear was nothing compared to his!

Slowly… holding on with everything I had… eyes barely opened…. and listening to every word of direction below me, I descended safely back to the security of solid ground.

Scary comes in so many different costumes. There’s the black ugly spider costume…and there’s the costume designed with the scene of speaking to a room full of people… and then there’s the walking in dress shoes across glare ice costume, carrying the birthday cake for the party… Yes, all so scary.

Then there’s fear. Fear is a whole different species. It arrives on the scene in all its glory, parading around like it belongs. At times, fear enters subtly, creeping, covertly inching its way into our souls. And then there are moments where it comes screaming into the room, knocking valuable possessions over in its path, climbing higher and higher, seeking to conquer.

Beyond scary and fear… lies debilitating, crushing, threatening terror. Thank God most of us don’t experience terror too often. It is defined as “intense or overwhelming fear.”

Most of us, including myself, allow fear to control and dictate many of our decisions, and thereby miss the best, the beauty, the brilliance, the blessing, the bounty that God has for our lives.

Yes… God calls us to place our fear on the altar. And it’s hard. So hard. Because when it lands with a thud on the altar, we have handed the control over to Him.

It is then…. and only then… that we can experience the beauty of full surrender.

Travel with me, if you will. Grab your jacket and a coffee. We’re going to journey back a year or so… and then about 2,000 years beyond that. We’ll be gone awhile.

The night was dark and rainy, a little over a year ago. I was working and my shift was almost over. My cell phone lit up with an incoming call. I could see that it was my husband, and he rarely called me at that time of day. I took the call, and realized quickly that my husband was in shock. He had been in a terrible accident. It was a heart-breaking accident… leaving us struggling with the millions of “what if” questions … while trying to balance the scale with the truth of God’s sovereignty.

A year later, as the one year mark approached, many kind and caring family members and friends asked us how we planned to spend the evening. The answer was always the same….
“We just want to be at home that night.” As the date grew closer, I became aware of the needs for volunteers at a homeless shelter where we serve. Feeling that it would be good for us to spend some time there during the day, I reached out to offer our help. The response I received was that yes, they needed help… during the later evening shift.

God calls us to place our fear on the altar.

Together… with some struggle but with God’s help … we lifted our fear and placed it out of our reach…on the altar. As we drove out of the driveway… in the dark… on a rainy, dismal night… we saw clearly what God was doing. He was slowly, gently, releasing our white-knuckled hands from the grip we had on our safety… so that He could use us and bless us beyond what we imagined. And we almost missed it.

But let’s travel on…. back over 2,000 years… to a little town named Galilee… where there was a young girl… who had been chosen to carry the Son of God in her womb. She had been spoken to by an angel, informed that she was favored by God and would give birth to a baby boy… and she was to call Him “Jesus.” She was humbled, challenged… and I’m sure at times, humiliated.

As her time to deliver approached, Joseph, the man she loved, informed her that they’d be traveling to Bethlehem to register. This would be approximately four to five days… or 70 to 80 miles…either by foot or riding on a donkey.

As far as we know, Mary left on that trip, not knowing if she’d deliver while away, where she’d be sleeping at night and what to expect with the delivery of a child.

What she did know is that God had called her to this. God had called her to put her fears on the altar.

So what did she do? She took the first step towards Bethlehem. God handled the rest.

What about you?

What fear is God calling you to place on the altar? Fear of failure? Fear of abandonment? Fear of imperfection? Fear of the unknown? Fear of pain? Fear of loneliness? Fear of unchartered waters? Fear of loss? Fear of grief? Fear of change? Fear of being in need?

Fear of trust? Trust means abandoning control. The Bible says, “Throw all your worry on Him, because He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7 Throw it? Yes… so it’s out of our reach.

From my heart to yours… Don’t miss out on all that God has for you. One step at a time… keeping your eyes looking to Him… take your fear and lay it on the altar…. and then stand back and watch God’s power on display. Take the first step towards what you know God is calling you to… He’s got you.

“Dear Jesus… You know this fear that immobilizes and controls me … the fear that keeps me from trusting You with full abandon. I’m asking You for Your help… in lifting this fear onto the altar of surrender. Thank You for all that You have been waiting to show me. I stand before You humbled, waiting in anticipation of watching your plan unfold in power. Thank You for loving me more than anyone has ever loved me.

In Your Sweet and Precious Name….”